Wing Wars: East vs. West

Chicken wings.

Now upon reading those two words, what kind of emotional or even physical response did I invoke? Many of you probably experienced a salivary response – namely uncontrollable mouth-watering. Others, including myself, may have even felt a tingle deep in their loins. Or maybe you’re like Carla and you just get really angry at me for bringing the memory of their deliciousness to your conscious mind, without the physical reward to back it up.

I’m no scientician, but that’s a pretty powerful food. And last week The Toronto Star just happened to post a video by some food guy on how to make some good ass baked wings. So myself and cockle-doodle-Darla decided, let’s save a little cash this week and see if this guy knows what the hell he’s talking about.

Let the experiment begin:



We got three pounds to split between the two of us. And by two of us, I mean five of us since Carla’s appetite is essentially the same as four large men. Luckily for me, three pounds of raw wings from the grocery store is like 4 or 5 pounds at a wing joint, so I was actually able to snatch a few before Carla created her chicken graveyard. The video called for pretty basic prep instructions, just S&P and then baking powder to get them wings all crispy. 


Lay them fools out!

Have you ever seen something in your home then thought to yourself “when the hell did I get that?!” Well I have, and that item is wax paper. I think it’s pretty useless unless you’re going to a 1940’s themed party and want to bring a sandwich. Screw wax paper, but parchment paper…you’re cool. Parchment paper doesn’t burn in the oven and the wings don’t stick to it. The video said to space the wings out a little but I only have two pans so they were packed tightly like chickens in a henhouse.


Sauce ’em & Toss ’em!

Now ol’ Eric had a hankering for some buffalo wings so I bought some Frank’s buffalo wing sauce and melted a little butter into it. Carla decided to go with more of an asian-inspired sauce so she blended some green tea and rice together. Now that I’ve had my signature racist moment I can tell you that her sauce was actually made primarily from soy sauce and brown sugar. After about 15 minutes per side we snatched ’em out sauced ’em up, threw ’em back in for another 5-10 and then gorged.


The Score!

Crispyness: 16 why doesn’t KFC sell just chicken skin’s out of 21
Ease of recipe: 18 Shoop Bay Doop’s out of 22
Wing Taste: 18 Rolls of Parchment paper out of 23
Buffalo Sauce: 7 Jim Kelly’s out of 10
Asian Sauce: 8 General Tao’s out of 10

Seems like we were pretty generous…but it’s our blog so BACK OFF! Final score is a tasty little 67 out of 86. If you’re looking for an easy way to make baked wings…then look no further. If you’re like my ol’ pal Dave Palmer and you’ve already mastered the art of wing-making, then enjoy the way too many links I posted. FLHB is on hiatus next week but we will return even weaker than before. Happy Friday! 


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